Presence and authenticity

I have spoken at several events in recent months to women climbing up the career tree and some of what I, and others, have said is resonating a bit with me in relation to the general election results.

It’s really tough: while you are working your socks off you also need to plan your career progression, make sure you network with appropriate people, find sponsors or mentors, be ahead of the game,  develop your skills – the list is endless.  Then there are the other behaviours you need to exhibit – we have moved on from “think out of the box” and “walk the walk” to “fake it until you make it” through to the latest – “be authentic” I am sure you can come up with clichés by the dozen.

Unquestioningly you need to develop presence: something that ensures that people notice you, look at you and listen to you.  That is where the technique lies but after that is authenticity.  For the former – take acting classes!  I am finding that more and more of the successful women I meet took acting classes (me too!) perhaps at school or college or even amateur dramatics. You learn how to develop presence and how to think yourself into a part and project it even though you are so nervous you could be sick!

So now you have the tools – what about authenticity. I didn’t want to headline this article “Did a lack of authenticity lose Labour the election” as we are a bit electioned out - but I am wondering if that was the case. 

Today’s press is full of post election analysis but one article in particular rang a chord. It is a superb article about Ed Miliband’s leadership by Philip Collins in The Times today Conviction politician lacked self-awareness right to the very end. It is more than that – Collins comments, “To the end he seemed detached and unknowable.” 

The persona that he was projecting was not authentic.

Whatever your political views David Cameron seems comfortable in his own skin. Yes, it may be a posh Tory-boy skin and rolling up his sleeves or taking off his tie doesn’t change that – but he is comfortable. So you think you know what you are getting. Perhaps that’s why some people who felt embarrassed to admit to voting Tory did in the end – at least you felt that what you saw was what you would get - he just felt the most authentic.

Brave or foolish – the recipe file is being culled!

Last year I read Marie Kondo’s “The Life-changing Magic of Tidying”.  I am not a tidy person and while this book did not change my life completely it did inspire a clear out of “stuff”, especially clothes. (One jacket I bought on sale about six years ago I have never worn – every time I put it on I don’t like it – but it’s new so how can I get rid of it? Marie says that objects must “spark joy” so perhaps it will do that for a customer in the charity shop.)

My parents loved food and creative cooking. South Africa in the 1950s and 1960s had a wealth of fresh produce but if you wanted pasta you got spaghetti or macaroni – lasagne was unheard of as were many other things you can find in even the smallest corner store today.  So my mother made lasagne and filo pastry, ground her own spices and produced all the chutneys, jams and the other preserves and pickles that were the norm. We had three freezers and a large pantry. She collected recipe books too. My mother-in-law was a wonderful baker and I have many of her recipes although her famous recipe book disappeared and every family member is sure that someone else has it!

For years I have also been collecting recipes from magazines, newspapers etc. Some are transferred to index cards and others put in a box.  Some I have made successfully and others not, and many I haven't ever tried but keep in case..... I have a huge box of index cards and another full box of cuttings.

I am in the process of typing up all my well-used recipes and converting them to metric – some are in American measures (South Africa pre-metric), some are in Imperial so at least they will be consistent. I can then put them on my iPad or a memory stick and take them with me. (I used to say if the house caught fire, once the people were out my recipe box was next to be saved.)

As I go through the recipe cards, my new resolution is that I either need to make it or throw it away (apart from family recipes).  If I suddenly need to make something and don't have a recipe - there's the internet or my friend and chef, Paul Wenham!

Courage!